When Enough is Enough

Blek, ever feel like the walls are closing in on you, or that you must be cursed. Why, because there is no other "logical" explanation. Well I'm there. I mean maybe having my darling Sean and a great daughter used up all my luck for a while. But in the past two months or so, lets have a look at the list shall we: back to work (stress at work-getting recertified in everything and all that fun stuff), class, class interrupted, getting back to class and finished by the end of October for work, clinicals, ridiculous costs for Rx's, dads, moms, ex step moms, sister, Lucy gets sick for the first time and becomes a mommy's gal thus I get sick too, finances, oh and lets not forget my stroke, heart surgery, friend's death, and this week I most likely won't see Lucy till Friday. Grrr, its just surprise after surprise for us, and I am trying to remember that there is a light at the end of this tunnel. By next Thursday class and clinicals will be done, and I'll just have work for a while. As for relationships, none but the one I've had with Sean and my Grandma Bonnie have ever really been easy. (maybe Vicator.) Regardless, I can't take care of everyone and to be honest with an open mind/heart is all I can do. I'm just done giving more than me or mine get back is all. Still I have to remember that it could have been worse. The hospitals and great family support where here for us with the stroke. That had I been in Buffalo I might not have made it to the funeral. That I can lean on folks and its not just my burden to bare. Perhaps that next month won't bee so bad. Halloween is just around the corner after all, and I'm very much looking forward to Melissa's party this weekend. If nothing else Lucy in a pink poodle costume will be a guarantee to make me smile. Alright I've had a good vent. As for tomorrow, another 14 hour day, but I'll try to have high hopes.
Life isn't all doom and gloom though. Now for something purely indulgent to make me happy, here is a reason to wish I were skinny - oh and had a disposable income. Sweet P is a terrific designer. Oh another thing keeping me going is Supernatural, if you haven't watched it yet check out Sidereel. Plus I got a kick out of the new Fey/Palin skit and Its Always Sunny. With Sean to make me laugh I'll make it through but every gal needs to let it out now and then. Now if I could just find a squirrel costume....